Monday, January 25, 2010

Scary Moments

Dear Little Bean,

Your mama really had some scary moments yesterday. I woke up to find some brown spotting and my heart sank. I immediately called the doctor. Need to make sure you are okay, you know? You are a gift from God and just like with all gifts, I know that He gives and takes away. But I prayed to keep you. 

So I saw the doctor today to make sure you were okay. What an amazing experience. You are so well developed already. I can't believe it. You waved at me with a perfect hand with five perfect little fingers. I saw your spine, and its beautiful straight line. It was such a wonderful experience. For as scared as I was, to hear your heartbeat again and see every part of you was such a relief. I am so glad you are okay. Everything about you is fine. 

Keep on growing in there, my Little Bean. You still have a long time to wait to meet me face to face. Just stay healthy in there!



Saturday, January 16, 2010

Still Growing

Dear Little Bean,

It's still such a strange thing to know that you are living inside of me.  You have taken up residency in my womb. It's amazing to think about that. 

I'm waiting ever so patiently to find out if you are a girl or a boy. But it still seems like forever away to wait. It's another two months of waiting to get that ultrasound so that I can prepare for you, my love. Mommy wants to make everything perfect for you. 

Your dad is getting more excited. He talks to you all the time. I know you can't hear him yet, but that's okay. He'll keep talking to you and one of these weeks, you will finally be able to hear his voice. 

Your furry sister still doesn't know about you. I guess she'll have to wait until you are born to understand. She thinks she's the baby these days and since you took up a home in my womb, she has been more of a "Mommy's Girl." It's funny to realize that she knows that things are different, even if she doesn't know how. She was always "Daddy's Girl" and cuddles up on his lap to get her ears rubbed. Now, she cuddles up with me on my lap and wants to be loved. She's got a shocker coming over the summer when she realizes that she is a dog and not really a baby.

Until my next letter, my child, remember that Mommy and Daddy love you very much. It's such an amazing experience to know that you and I are a few months closer to meeting each other. 200 days to go until our expected meeting...


Saturday, January 9, 2010

Little Hands and Feet

My Darling Child,

I got a chance to see you again this week. 10 weeks in, still feels like forever until we can meet face to face. But time is going by!

I was so excited to see your hands and feet. How amazing it is! I saw your beautiful heart beating away again and got to listen to it. Amazing. Nothing is as precious as knowing you are finally growing, real, living. 

My child, you are beautiful already. I can't wait to see you again. Although, that probably won't be until 20 weeks when I can find out if you are a girl or a boy. 

I have fallen in love with you already, my child. A mother's love is undeniable. I loved you before I knew you existed and now, that love is just growing. My heart melts every time I see you. And each time, I see something else that is new, that has grown. You are precious and loved already.