Sunday, July 25, 2010

A Mother's Wish

Dear Isabella,

Time is coming closer to when we finally get to meet each other face to face. This is the day I have prayed for, dreamed of, wished for for three long years. There are no words to describe the emotions I have right now, as I wait in anticipation to hold you in my arms at last. I am nervous about so many things and yet the single thought of hearing your cries and coos and seeing your beautiful face makes all my fears seem to melt away. 

In less than three days, Izzy, I can finally see your perfect little fingers and toes. I can watch you sleep and know that you are a gift to your daddy and me. I can make you smile, hear your cries, and know that God has blessed me richly with your little life. In less than three days, God's plans for me as a mother will begin with you. 

My wish for you as I wait in anticipation is that you would know how much I have waited for you, prayed for you, and dreamed of you. My wish is that you would always know the love that surrounds you from your dad, me, and all of our family and friends. You have been wanted and prayed over by more people than you will ever know. My wish is that you would know how blessed we are to have you in our lives. We have been blessed throughout the past three years, with waiting to conceive you and then with waiting these past nine months to finally meet you. We are so blessed by you. My wish is that you will grow up to know that we are very much wanted and loved. There isn't a single ounce of my heart than doesn't well up with emotion when I think of all the adventures that await us as you grow older. My wish for you is that you always know you are special. God created you with nobody else in mind. You are made for a purpose and that is to serve Him. You are a gift from Him and we are blessed by that gift.

Oh, Isabella, soon I will hold you in my arms. Soon I can kiss your sweet cheeks and touch your soft baby skin. Soon, I can hold you in my arms, rock you to sleep, and sing you lullabies. Until then, my sweet child, I will be waiting in anticipation.


Tuesday, July 20, 2010

I Can Hardly Wait!

My Dear Isabella,

Your scheduled arrival date is now set for July 28th. Since you like to tumble around and wiggle so much, you aren't in the position they want to see you in. So I have a surgery date and time in place, just in case you don't do what you should. That day is a week from tomorrow. Oh, Isabella, words cannot express the joy in my heart as I anxiously wait for your arrival. 

There was a time where I really thought this day may never greet me. I was in a place where my faith was shaken a bit and I wanted to be in control of when and how you would be conceived. I gave all that to God, laid it at His feet. I had to give up my dream of a child in MY time. It's when I was able to lay down my dreams that God took over control and kept to His promise of a child. We prayed so hard for you before you were ever conceived. We prayed for you when we first decided to start a family. God has granted our wish for a child by blessing us with you. We have been so blessed already by your life and you aren't even outside the womb yet!

Oh, my darling child, I cannot fathom the joy that awaits me when they first lay you in my arms. Oh how I cannot stand the anticipation of that moment! I'm teary-eyed just thinking of how I will feel when I hold you, kiss you, hug you, and see you for the first time. I can't wait to touch your ten perfect little fingers, to kiss your soft baby skin, to rock you to sleep in my arms. There are no words to really express how it feels to be waiting in such anticipation for that moment. What's more is that I will be so filled with love and joy when I see your Daddy hold you for the first time. He's been waiting for you for so long. He's like a child waiting for an exciting vacation. His sleep has been broken with thoughts of you. 

It has been such a long journey to get us to this day of waiting. But every step of that journey was worth the pain, the sorrow, the fear, and the tears. Those are all things that were part of the path God placed us on. There are no words for how thankful I am for all that it took to conceive you. I'm thankful for the tears, for the pain, for the fear of never meeting you. It is through all of those experiences that I am able to appreciate the blessing of your life. You were promised to us three years ago when your Dad and I first prayed about a family. And in a week, we will finally meet you, God's promise to us. I love you, you are the joy of my heart!



A Letter From Your Daddy

This is a letter written the other night when your Daddy couldn't sleep.

My Dear Isabella,

I'm writing to you as I wait for you to come into this world. Your entire family is awaiting your arrival more than you will ever know. By the time you read this, you will hopefully be a healthy, vibrant young lady. But just ten months ago, your Mother and I thought we might never see you.

While you may have already heard from us how hard it was to conceive you, words cannot express the pain and sorrow we had in our hearts. It took so long to conceive you-almost two and a half years-that your Mother gave up almost all hope. It took a team of doctors eleven months to find out how to conceive you. Most parents never go through that, and I hope that when you grow up, you'll never go through it, either.

You can only imagine the joy in our hearts when we woke up Thanksgiving morning to find out your Mom was pregnant! Since then, you have had so many people rooting for you. Your family, many of our friends, people we work with, and even random people who heard our story started praying for you. They all prayed that you would make it safe and sound, nine months later, into this world.

That's why we named you "Isabella Joy." When we first decided to name you, the name "Isabella" came to mind because we found that it means "God's Promise." We gave you the middle name "Joy" because of the joy you have brought to our family.

However, Isabella can also mean "Consecrated to God," and I pray that you will be consecrated to the Lord. Rephrasing Samuel 1:27-28, "We prayed for this child, and the Lord has granted us what we asked of Him. So now, we give you to the Lord. For your whole life, you will be given over to the Lord." You  are a special child, Isabella, and every day we will hope and pray that you will grow up not only loving the Lord, but serving Him as well.

Someday soon, we'll tell you the whole story of everything it took to bring you into this world, but for now, we hope that you understand that your Heavenly Father wanted you so much that He waited until now for you to be born. He could have given us a child much sooner, but then we would never have had you, and you will always be special in our hearts. 

May you always know that you are loved,
And that you learn how to share God's love with others.
May you always know that you are blessed,
And one day, bless others in His name.
May you always know that you are God's gift to us,
And one day, give unto others as He has given to you.


Your Earthly Father

Thursday, July 8, 2010

Keep Baking, Little One!

Dear Isabella,

It's been quite an interesting adventure, this last month. You certainly keep life interesting, never a dull moment. I'm so thankful that you are still baking and are showing no signs that you want to come out any time. Keep doing that, you're not ready to come out yet! 

So, I have to be honest with you, Izzy. I'm so excited to meet you and hold you soon. But I'm so nervous about the process of labor. I scheduled a c-section today for July 28th just in case you decide to not change positions. You have yourself wedged into a very awkward and seemingly dangerous position. You might want to think about moving, since Mommy really would love to pop you out instead of having surgery to get you out. So although I want you to keep baking, I would really like it if you could move into the correct position for birth. You don't have a lot of time left!

Your room is all set up and ready for you now. We're just waiting on your arrival. But really, there is no rush. You still have a few weeks left before you need to arrive. So just take your time and relax in there. I love getting to see you twice a week at doctor's appointments. That is more than enough for now, since I really want you to bake longer. You're getting bigger, stronger, and healthier. Soon, you'll be ready to greet the big world with your sweet self. I may be impatient and say I can't wait, but I'm waiting and I want to wait as long as I have to for you. I love you, Little One!!